My Allegory of James 1 -

"It took 6 months- but God is good- and it took me to write this to discover that James 1 was the work He did- that Faith without works is dead- "I can say that He is alive and not just by what I read in the Bible- but by the work of the Bible in my life".

April 14th - Our house went on the market (an answer to some closet prayers)- thus beginning the declutter process: yardsale, packing "extras" and shipping them to the inlaws and my sister's. Then the showings begin- and with 3 kids , in the midst of Homeschooling and wrapping up the school year- it was hell on earth- I became this "demon" Mom who would turn tyrant at the touch of a pillow that was nicely placed on the couch or a toy that gallanted from the hand of toddler onto the floor- As soon as the house was cleaned a mess would shortly follow- James 1:1-3 " Consider it pure joy my brethren when you fall under various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience" I had a hard enough time with the mere thought that strangers were going to be coming to our home and "snooping" - I wanted these house hounters to at least have something good to say about the space when they are looking for one reason not to consider this their house; one couple came in , saw a hose strayed across the yard (loving everything else about the house) and because they saw this hose- it was an absolutely no!!- another one was - the color of the paint on the wall- loved everything about the house but the yellow paint- its like hello people- havent you ever heard of ... paint?- !! Anyways - I can see that this blog is going to turn into a short novel very quickly if I am not careful! and I would hate to bore you with my wrambling. so moving on... We only had one offer on our home- and I was correctly encouraged thats all it would take.. one person to like your house.. and after 27 showings.. you can say that i was beginning to take it personally.. okay .. it was after the 4th showing.. and after the thoughts would shoot into my mind like a fire has no question it is hot- i began to be flooded with the assumption that this house was a curse in my life for all the mess that we I have made for myself and my family- James 1:4"Perseverance must finish its work so you can be mature and complete, not lacking anything" I began to seperate myself from my family, my kids , my husband thinking that I was destroying them by just being me.. let me just say SATAN IS A LIAR and i was believing all that was being whispered into my ear.

James 1:5 " If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him."

So with the house being on the market - alot of other things decided to come up from the wood work- God was doing a work in my heart- He wanted me to let go of all the lies, the chaos going on in my mind and heart- I again was not trusting Him, that my life was in His hands and that He made me for such a time as this , to parent these children, to love and help my husband , and to be a friend, a sister a .. you get it.. He loves my kids, husband so much more than I ever could- and yet He chose me to be there to fill a part in their lives -and only through Him could these things blossom into something eternally meaningful <3> James 1:6-8 ""But let him ask in faith , with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind. for let not that man suppose that he will recieve anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways."

I was reminded how He had already moved in my life over the coarse of the last 8 years of my walk with Him, that He had a plan for me , to prosper me , and I could look back and see how he had carried me this far- and for me to recall the many prayers that I prayed regarding foster care /adoption and God revealing to me His will in that regards, and it was on my heart to pray for forgiveness ( James 1:21- "Therefore lay aside all filthiness and overfloiw of wickedness, and recieve with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls") and for me to believe in a time of unbelief; .. if our mission was to do this that God would move on my husband's heart - and when Dave mentioned selling the house- it was confirmation to those many recent prayers- I knew that God was moving and in a literal way- so I could only expect that If God was going to be doing His work that the enemy would try to creep in and destroy His work- and with that I can say that he may have crept in and mingled with my mind and decissions to be in disbelief and unrelience on God's Almighty power in our lives- but that snake didnt win so much as a crumb- His word was at work in our lives- even in the midst of mental disbelief: James 1:22-25 God came in picked me up and loved me and showed Himself to me through it all - and to sum it up - we sold our house on my Birthday!!

" James 1:17- Every good and perfect gift comes down from above, and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning"

I know that I know that I know my God lives- He reigns in my heart and in my mind- and no matter how many times I fall - He will be there to lift me up- and enable me to do His will!!

James 1:27- "...to visit orphans and widows in time of trouble, and to keep oneself unspotted from the world"

Momentous Monday!!

I was feeling pretty drough today with missing the ladies Monday study that I attend at my Church with us going through the stomach bug blues at our home, but greatful to keep it home rather than spreading the plague ;)
I woke up mad at the world- my Husband, my kids,and My God - I was just mad and couldnt figure out what was wrong with my thinking, it was unrational and unecessary. I remember thinking, " okay Ronnie this is rediculous, you really need to settle down and go to God with this stinkn thinkn". So did I? Nope- I continued through the day feeling resentment and out of my mind mad. At this point into this blog your probably thinking to yourself- okay! and she is calling this a momentous Monday? a "Spiritual reflection of a memory that I want to share with the "world"", or better yet," a nugget of truth from God's word"- ha!! Sorry- its a stinkn thinkn matter at this point into it, but it gets better... I promise!!

Okay so as I was continuing through the day, it was about 10 and I started reading the book of mormon because the LDS missionaries dropped by and asked me to pray weither Joseph Smith were true in his prophecies or not and I told them that I am grounded in the Word of God and that I will not remove my feet from God's word- so if this Book of Mormon contradicts God's word than we are done conversing. So to say the least, I need to hand them their book and let them move on unless they are willing to hear about the real Jesus.

On Christ the solid ground I stand all other ground is sinking sand, all other ground is sinking sand.

Okay so I decided to pray that the Holy Spirit would lead me through the study that I was doing and holding the B.O.M( Book of Mormon) up to the light of the scriptures and God showed me a really cool verse from the book of John that really summed up . John 8:30- 32

30: "As He spoke these words,many believed in Him. 31:Then Jesus said to those Jews who believed in Him, If you abide in My word you are My disciples indeed.32: And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free." this last verse was the one that the missionaries for another testament of Jesus Christ wanted me to pray regarding wether Joseph Smith were true and wether or not I should follow his teachings. :O Please dont get me wrong I am NOT anti-mormon- I am just anti any literature that goes against the word of God, and if God's word says that I only need to abide in His word which is the Holy Bible( the book that has changed me for every good and meaningful thing ever ) that I have been reading for almost 9 years now than there is just no other option for me. (( period))

Okay so with this I know that what I believe to be true about God and Him being who He say He is, the Alpha and Omega the Beginning and The End!! The Author and Perfector of my faith. (Just to name a few) and it wasnt because I prayed and asked God weither or not He was who He said He was - it was because I asked Him to show Himself to me.. and He did!! He is all I need! I know I am going on and on and I really appreciate your time if you have read this far into what it is that I wanted to share- it means alot to know that even one person would take the time to "listen" to little me. Okay so where I wanted to go with this was a little prayer I made to today asking God to show love to me through my husband in a way that I would know it was from HIM!!! I hadnt talked to my husband all day- and we usually talk a good 3 times while he is at work, so this just made me realize that I had really hurt him with my words this morning :(. So he comes home and he has this bag with a wrapped gift in it. I open it up and it is a beautiful butterfly!! A symbol to me that I am a new creation. Which brings me to this verse: 2Cor. 5:17- " If anyone is in Christ he( she) is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold all things have become new." A settle reminder that I am in Christ~~ no matter how stinky my heart can be at times- I belong to Him! I am sorry Lord that I have disappointed You and others that You have placed in my life- thank You for such a unconditional love that You have for all !!

I love how God uses my husband in ways that not even he knows about!! He is such a good God a God who loves you right where you are, no matter how many times you have blown it.
If you are reading this and you are not a Christian and you would like to beleive on Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and Savior than I would like to invite you to do so now, this will be the one thing that will make the most impact on both your life here on earth and your eternal life in Heaven. the scriptures say: "For whoever calls on the name of the Lord shall be saved." Romans 10:13
tell the Lord that you believe in Him and you will be saved <3 read your Bible or go to a Bible Believing Church and get aquanted with the people! and remeber
Jesus loves you!!!

Theres a Cry in My Heart!!

I have this song pressing on my heart this morning and with the meaning behind it I thought it would be a great opportunity to be Spiritually Lead through this blog to what it is that God would have me say in these regards: " What is it that You want me to be persuing for Your Kingdom"
Before I continue on I would like to quote from this song:

"Cry In My Heart"
By Starfield
"There's a cry in my heart
For Your glory to fall
For Your presence to fill up my senses
There's a yearning again
A thirst for discipline
A hunger for things that are deeper
Could You take me beyond?
Could You carry me through?
If I open my heart?
Could I go there with You?
(For I've been here before
But I know there's still more
Oh, Lord, I need to know You)

For what do I have
If I don't have You, Jesus?
What in this life
Could mean any more?
You are my rock
You are my glory
You are the lifter
Of my head
Lifter of this head "

Through this song and what is is asking- What do I have if I dont have You Jesus?

What in this life could mean anything? Life without Jesus is meaningless, hopeless, all the opposites of what Jesus has to offer me. Not to say that I have days feeling empty, lonely and discontented in my spirit. But He is the lifter of my head and I ALWAYS have Him to turn to.

(to sum it up I cant do anything without Him- If He is not the rock of my life then where does my strength come from?) If I am tired in my flesh with living day to day knowing that I have the power of my savior to move mountains; yet not His love then I have nothing. 1 Cor.13:2

I think I can convince people to open their eyes to see what they believe is a lie- that they are following after a false Jesus, and yet I dont have the compassion as Jesus did for the lost. I am in the wrong place- I need to have a genuine heart to lead these people in love to the truth- just as Jesus fed and clothed and even healed, I need to present the gospel in a loving way not a way that condemns them to hell for not believing the Bible which is the roots of my being.Ephesians 3:17-19 How can I show them? In some way remove the scales from their eyes and the immediate answer is: Leviticus 10:3 " 'Among those who approach me
I will show myself holy;
in the sight of all the people
I will be honored.' "
Aaron remained silent. It is not up to me to get the point across- to save the lost and win them over to the Lord- it is by His power and my willingness to be used by Him- "HE WILL SHOW HIMSELF" ... Haleluja!!! Thank You Jesus!!

I wish not to share what this prayer is in complete details refering to - just for the sake of keeping the peace! But I dont want to waste time, "casting my pearls before swine" If God cant get through to them and open their eyes- "remove the scales of deception" then I need to move on- and realize that seeds where planted and that God loves people and what He started He will complete.- It doesnt have to be through me.
God, theres a cry in my heart for Your Mercy to fall, For you presence to fill up my senses..."

What is the cry in your heart? You can cry out to God, He has great plans to prosper you in all you do , pray to Him and He will hear you and He will be found by you !!Jer.2911-14

<3

Marriage Vows!!

 

This never is easy- I suppose it would be nice to for once share something that is easy- but I think that this is something that God is working in our lives to make us more like Him... Thank you to all of you who have supported me in my blog writing and sharing things that are not easy for me to share- thank you for loving me anyways and letting me know it- the comments really keep me going. I need my friends to comment- it spurs me on to keep going in this BLOG journey!!
Okay- I wanted to blog about something that God has done in my life over the course of the last couple of weeks( It was a friends idea actually; See your comments really play a part in this).....okay anyways!!!! It reared its ugly head a few weeks back on the night of the Father Daughter Ball - and as I shared that was dealing with alot of emotional vomit a friend lovingly said- " well honey, have you prayed and asked God to reveal to you why you responded that way?" so taking that into consideration I gave my anger and hurt to God; and before things got better they took a turn for the worse. I definitely have a problem with outbursts of rage- ( not easy to confess , but its the truth)
James 5:16
"Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective."
I am pretty passive when it comes to conflict- I would much rather avoid it mainly because I know my response when it comes to parenting and marriage!! I think that they don't hear me and that the only way that I can get across is by yelling!!ARGGG!!I know that is not true- it is more of an issue of how I confront the situation.. I just don't!~ I let it go and go on and on until the camels back breaks.... Okay so now that I have gotten that out of the way- Here's what God has been telling me.
"Ronnie you have made a covenant to love your husband.. and you don't.... you have made a covenant to love me.. and well, you haven't.. Love is not something you say - it is something you DO!! How have you been showing love to your husband and how have you been showing love to me? You cannot love him in and of yourself.. because honey, I am LOVE!!! ouch- I love you Father, I read your word, I ask You for help,I.. " But you don't trust me, You have been living in this home with resentment and unforgiveness for things that I have forgotten, I have a future and hope for you and your husband and YOU are in the way" I want you to move aside and stand at my right hand and let me move in the hearts of those that I love, I need you to trust that I am at work in your lives and that I will not leave you here, I have loved you with an everlasting love-No Matter what~~~
So with this .. I got mad at Dave and lost my ring, ( well I chucked it at him and said I cant do this by myself so here you go....) So my ring was nowhere to be found.. Hannah my oldest found the wedding band a couple days later, but the engagement ring was nowhere to be found. I know God was telling me that I would not find it until I would wear it and mean it. I did a little research on the history of the wedding ring and what it represents:
The wedding band's shape represents an unbroken promise of love and commitment. The circle has no beginning and no end; therefore, the marriage has no end.In ancient times, the Egyptians and the Romans shared the belief that a vein from the fourth finger lead directly to the heart. As such, it seemed a logical place for the placement of the wedding band. The practice was passed down and the fourth finger is now universally known as the ring finger.
Okay! So 2 weeks have past and I still have not found my engagement ring... We went to a marriage conference and I didn't want anyone to see that my ring was missing so I turned it over in hopes that none to see so I wouldn't have to lie and say it was in the shop. What I didn't know was that this weekend would be one in which God would place in my heart a deep love for my husband, I love my husband I really do , but this was a different love!! A love that keeps no record of wrong, a love that assumes the best!! a love that.. well here's the verse 1 Corinthians 3:4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
God had done something in me that could be only because I was in a place of humility- I was wrong and I admit it!! My husband does love me and want to be the best that he can be and I am tearing him down all the time because he isn't doing things the way that I think he should or , he's not being the spiritual leader that I think God wants him to be......" So with that I surrendered.
I came home from that retreat a changed woman. As I was picking weeds in my garden and praying that God would bless my husband at work and give him strength and that He would pick all the weeds from our marriage so that He could take root in those areas and low and behold sitting right there in front of me amidst the weeds was my wedding ring :O I really believe that God had sent an angel into our home the previous Wednesday and had it placed there- I say that because we came home that night to our front door wide opened!! Okay it may not be true, but how else would it have gotten outside when where I through it was inside the house in the dining room ? hmm!! I will let you decide what may have happened- but all I can say is that I have my wedding ring back and it is there to stay- and I mean it!!

The Jungle Gym!!

I havent been writting in my blog for the last couple weeks- not that i have a regular schedule - although I love the idea that many have of writting every other day! Anywho!!
I though it would be appropriate to blog about the parenting challenges and convictions that I have been overcoming by the Grace of God.
On Friday of last week Dave ( my husband ) and I thought it would be a great idea to take the kids to a restaunt with an indoor jungle gym and get a little time to 'kick up our feet' and talk while the children enjoyed some much needed running around. So as we finished up our meals and the kids were off playing - Dave and I were enjoying some interupted convo- given we have our one year old running around - so my eye was on him while my ears were on Dave; up until we heard the most horrible screams of what I though were death coming from my two girls- Dave and I were panicing running around this hamster cage of a jungle gym. I had a picture in my head of a child being strangled or entrapted by a net or something- the screams where that horrifying. I couldnt get my girls to calm down to talk to me of what was going on. I finally yelled and said " Hannah, you need to tell me what is going on" She was screaming back to this little boy who was apparantly choking her, punching her in the back , pulling her hair and yes, shoving his hand down here throat" SHe was telling him NO, you stop it" my 4 year old was screaming in fear for what was happening to her sister. This went on for a good 3 minutes until the Father of this little boy went up to get him. I heard them mention " Is he beating her up, long before they went up to get the little bugger. He must have been 3 or 4. Anyways!! with all this I was furious with the way the parents handled the situation:the Mother was standing alongside me to retrieve our children, as soon as he came down, his Father walked by to return to his seat as the Mother glared at me , I got down to eye level and asked my girls what happend, holding them and comforting them, as Hannah told me what this little boy had done, the mother and the little boy began to walk away, I stopped him by scooting over in front of him and told him
" what you did was not okay, you dont treat people that way" his Mom did not like that , and maybe I was out of line for interfering that way, but I was so furious and if his Mom wasnt going to scold him than I was:O Arg!! So the girls were collected and went on their way to playing. The rest of the time there was awkward. This little boy was sitting with his parents screaming and crying that he was sorry, as the Mom continued to stare the glare at me , for what I had said to her son. Man I really felt bad for taking over like that but it was just something that happened. Anyways!! I hear Hannah saying to her friend and sister , obviously for this little boy to hear " yeah! that little boy was mean" I called her down and she took a break as I explained to her," You talking like that of him was just as wrong as what he did to you, God wants You to be forgiving of the wrongs that others commit to you just as God forgives us of ours wrongs" Mathew 6:14 " For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you." She went on to tell me that she forgave him, through all his crying that he was sorry- (I believe that he was)Hannah walked up to him and said that she forgave him.
We left that evening and I was wondering why we had gone there in the first place, asking God why? Why did we go there if we would be such a horrible witness- we sat there , prayed for our meal in front of all these people, laughed with eachother , and then things appeared to go bad:( this is how my last couple weeks have gone, we have gone places , without recieving or doing anything that seems to be accomplishable, nothing that just speaks out- "well done, you have been a light and aroma of Christ" which is my prayer when we go out in public. It has been so disheartening to feel like a waste of God's resources. BUT I have been encouraged through this crazy Jungle Gym. I have God on my side- You have God on your side too!! no matter how messy a situation can be . No matter what we face while we are in the Jungle Gym of Life- God will not abandon us when things get rough! He will be there to carry us through. He will give us a way of escape and He will fulfill His purpose.
Psalm 138:8
" The LORD will fulfill His purpose for me; your love, O LORD, endures forever- do not abandon the works of your hands. "

To God Be the Glory!!

My prayer this last week was that the Lord would stir up the gifts that He has given me- I am not sure where I have heard that- if its a verse or just something I read in a book- but sure enough in a very visual way He has shown me what those gifts were. I believed that the desires I had for sewing and photography were there with a purpose- for the sewing it brough me to Jamaica to teach young ladies to sew for a skill in making money for their families- and this week I got a email response from a nurse from a local Hospital asking me to make scrubs for her and other Nurse friends. With photography I have taken pictures of my friends kids,their families and even 1 wedding - all for the joy of doing it. I absolutely love the idea that I am able to bless someone with a gift like that will bless them for the rest of their lives and something that they can also pass on to someone else. So with that... I have been asked to do a wedding and they even want to pay me :o .. I cant believe it- I am nervous and have no idea what I am doing, but I really believe that this is God's hand and I have no doubt that they wont turn out... I give God the glory for this and feel really unworthy to have such an opportunity as making someones most important day into a photographic display to share with their children and family. I have since then offered this opportunity with a friend who also shares the same passion for photography. so I pray that this will be something that will cause her little light to shine as well. These are such small things in all of peoples eyes- but God knows how incopmetant I am and these little things mean a BIG lot of sweet kinda lovn from my Big Daddy!!!
God has given me a peace to accept these things as the gifts that He has given me and they are the desires of my heart <3 and for that I am giving all the glory to God for ALL the things that he has done for me.... things so undeserved and the picture is Soo much bigger than the little things... He is a God who has plans for you Jer. 29
:11,12- to prosper you in all that you do, your parenting, your mentoring, your growing in His word and as a dear child to the King. I look forward to growing closer to Him and all the great things He has for me- I dont want to miss out on all His goodness!! To God Be The Glory- for the things He has done.. and will continue to do.

These Little Hands!!

 

These little hands so precious and so sweet
want to touch the things that I hold so dear
behind me in the kitchen I hear their little feet.
They look up to me and whisper in my ear,
"When I grow up I wanna be a Mommy just like you"
With which I reply ," Thank you for choosing me as your Mommy of the year!
Eliza made it clear that although Hannah wants to be a life guard for the Hermiston Aquatic Center- that she wants to be a Mommy just like me- no words added or taken away- thats the way she said it in her sweet little voice. It is such a lifted burden when I feel like such a failure that I must be pretty important to these little princess' Hannah told me that she wanted to be a Mommy too when she was in pre-school , but when she found out about the Ice cream truck - she soon changed her goals ;) This is just sweet that they have it in their hearts to be a Momma- and even sweeter that with all the wonderful Mommas they know they have chosen me ;) I dont think that they are too biased :) But God knows that I needed to hear that from them <3 They love to help me in the kitchen and I try to make every opportunity to let them- so today we made tortillas and how sweet to see them being such good little helpers- I love these little hands <3
1 Timothy 1:16
"But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his unlimited patience as an example for those who would believe on him and receive eternal life."

I am my beloveds and He is mine!!

 

Now that I have shared a piece of each of my children- I must share a little about my husband David Allen Purdy. He is a treasure - My beloved!! I really did get a great guy and he is truely a gift in my life. God knew EXACTLY what I needed in a husband- and I dont want to doubt His will!! Although I will say that I am not basing these words on how I feel - because how I feel and what I KNOW to be true are 2 completely differant things!
Romans 8:5
"Those who live according to the sinful nature have their minds set on what that nature desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires." Without Christ as the center of our marriage Our marriage would be based on what we can get from eachother. We are two; drawn together by the Father to live in one accord- Not what can I get from him ?", but rather, "how can I serve my spouse"? There is no other being on this planet that could ever replace the role that Dave plays in my life, my comforter, my listening ear, my best friend!! and The Father to my children, which look up to their Daddy as a reflection of who Christ is as their Heavenly Father.I dont think that they will ever have a doubt that their Heavenly Father loves them <3 Marriage and raising a family has been the most challenging responsibilty I have ever faced. It really is a giant in my life- really a fear that I face everyday as to weither I will fail and disappoint those I love- My Father in Heaven mostly. I though that we would walk hand in hand in agreement on every issue. That is not the case- AT ALL!! Man I have never disagreed with anyone more than my husband. And it is in times like this when I need to rely on my Heavenly Father that we were not meant to do this on our own- we have the Holy Spirit as our Helper and guide.
Ecclesiastes 4:12
"Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken." I am so greatful to God for helping us through our marriage to grow and be bonded together in Love.
I have grown so much through being a wife and a mother to our children, and I look forward to the rest of our lives together <3 I love you Davie!! You are my best friend and my beloved!!

Party at the Crib!

Braedy was not wanting to take a nap at his usual nap time today, and since the girls were still eating their lunch I thought it would be the perfect opportunity to play with him in his crib ;)
He loves to play peek a boo - and tried to get some shots of him in action- didnt quite go as I had pictured- but I think if I keep attempting to really capture the essence of his little character it will be one of those pictures that I can look at in 5 years and have that memory fresh im my mind.
Having a little boy is such a blessing~ Little girls are wonderful! and I love all the sweet princess stuff-There is just something so sweet about a little boy running around the house making vroom vroom and growling noises, high fives and tackles with Daddy <3  

 

 

 

 

Eliza

I always have a hard time getting pictures of Eliza- not because she isnt photogenic, but because she is just NOT interested- I usually have to get her into thinking that we are playing dress up and take her in to have someone else get the pictures, but she was into it!! She even had the idea of laying down on the chair like this and was Soo wonderful for me - I am still afraid of my camera and playing with it- but here it is- natural lighting and I have to say that these are some of the best pictures I have ever taken of my sweet Eliza <3

 

 

 

Photo happy!!

I have always wanted to be a photographer since my Aunt in NY gave me my first camera when I was 8( I remember feeling like I had a voice whenever I snapped the handle back and pressed the shiny red button:)It was never the wrong answer, or the incorrect meaning, I was understood and relieved that I had that freedom, I felt like I had found my place to "express myself" - I have always wanted to be known for what I LOVE- since having kids I make it a priority to capture what I can with my camera- and since my beloved got me every amateurs dream(a canon eos) I will be more photo happy in this new year- with that said- this is me with Hannah when she was just 3 standing next to none other than a photo display of her that I entered into the Benton Franklin County Fair- I plan on doing it again this year!! I many not be a "professional" which I wouldnt ever consider myself to be - but I will always love doing what I can to have these pictures of my kids for them to remember how stinkn cute they were growing up :)
 

Full of Grace!

"God hath made Him who knew no sin to be sin for us, that we might be made the righteousness of God in Him." 2 cor. 5:21

My friend asked me to write a paragraph about a time where I experienced the grace of God, I couldnt do it in a paragraph , but was excited to give this testimony to God and let Him be glorified in it.

What does this grace look like? When I hear the word grace I see God, the maker of heaven and earth, sending His only Son from a perfect place to descend into hell in the form of a cross, that we sinners( you and I) could be reconciled to God. We do not deserve this grace, nor is there anything that we alone can do to earn it."For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 6:15-22

I was once carnal minded- thinking of ways to get what I wanted in life- the easy way- the shortcut perhaps- but once I would get what I wanted I soon felt empty again - I wanted more - there was this void- Then I recieved an invitation to recieve the gift of God which is eternal life through His Son Jesus.

This was the open door where I would have a real touchable acknowledgement that God would be active in my life! So with that here is my story of grace: grace means "God’s love in action towards men who merited the opposite of love."
I got pregnant when I was 15. Without knowing there was support availalbe I went through with an abortion (I'm not saying that if there was support that my choices would have been differant, but that there is always support). I really didnt want to do this, but I didnt know what I would do otherwise. I felt alone and scared! And once again I followed through doing what I could to gain temperal relief from such a burden. 7 years would pass and I would find myself pregnant again, although this time I was married to a wonderful Christian man who loved me and the baby that we were blessed with, yet I was burdened with these same fears in my mind and thoughts that I would terminate the pregnancy. Romans 6:15 "What then shall we sin because we are not under law, but under grace? By no means!!"
I was at a pregnancy center where I took the free test they provided and when I found out I cried in fear for what I would do. I experienced the Hand of God in that room that day when the counselor told me there was a class for women who have had an abortion and that I could get healing and that God could use it to bring hope and healing to someone else.It was a hard process, but I got through the 8 week class, met other women hurting, and my eyes were opened to the reality of an abortion.Through it all I experienced God's grace in the form of the perfect baby that he gave me. He knew I would make that choice and yet He chose to love me regardless of the fact that I did kill my baby, and that I alone was accountable to this choice I made and yet He gave me what I do not deserve, forgiveness. And when I though He had done so much for me already He gave me the honor in giving her a name. I named her Providence ( which means divince guidance and care)which is a whole other blog in itself.
Another eight weeks and I would have the priviledge of naming our Hannah, which you got it... means full of grace!
"Behold what manner the love of the Father has given unto us, that we would called the children of God."

" All the places youll go"

the inspiration for my Blog- all the Credit goes to my childhood friend- Dr Seuss <3 I love you man!!!
Oh! The Places You’ll Go!
by the incomparable Dr. Seuss

Congratulations!
Today is your day.
You’re off to Great Places!
You’re off and away!

You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself any direction you choose.
You’re on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the guy who’ll decide where to go.

You’ll look up and down streets. Look’em over with care. About some you will say, “I don’t choose to go there.” With your head full of brains and your shoes full of feet, you’re too smart to go down a not-so-good street.

And you may not find any you’ll want to go down. In that case, of course, you’ll head straight out of town. It’s opener there in the wide open air.

Out there things can happen and frequently do to people as brainy and footsy as you.

And when things start to happen, don’t worry. Don’t stew. Just go right along. You’ll start happening too.

Oh! The Places You’ll Go!

You’ll be on your way up!
You’ll be seeing great sights!
You’ll join the high fliers who soar to high heights.

You won’t lag behind, because you’ll have the speed. You’ll pass the whole gang and you’ll soon take the lead. Wherever you fly, you’ll be best of the best. Wherever you go, you will top all the rest.

Except when you don’t.
Because, sometimes, you won’t.

I’m sorry to say so but, sadly, it’s true that Bang-ups and Hang-ups can happen to you.

You can get all hung up in a prickle-ly perch. And your gang will fly on. You’ll be left in a Lurch.

You’ll come down from the Lurch with an unpleasant bump. And the chances are, then, that you’ll be in a Slump.

And when you’re in a Slump, you’re not in for much fun. Un-slumping yourself is not easily done.

You will come to a place where the streets are not marked. Some windows are lighted. But mostly they’re darked. A place you could sprain both your elbow and chin! Do you dare to stay out? Do you dare to go in? How much can you lose? How much can you win?

And if you go in, should you turn left or right…or right-and-three-quarters? Or, maybe, not quite? Or go around back and sneak in from behind? Simple it’s not, I’m afraid you will find, for a mind-maker-upper to make up his mind.

You can get so confused that you’ll start in to race down long wiggled roads at a break-necking pace and grind on for miles across weirdish wild space, headed, I fear, toward a most useless place.

The Waiting Place…for people just waiting.

Waiting for a train to go or a bus to come, or a plane to go or the mail to come, or the rain to go or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow or waiting around for a Yes or No or waiting for their hair to grow. Everyone is just waiting.

Waiting for the fish to bite or waiting for wind to fly a kite or waiting around for Friday night or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake or a pot to boil, or a Better Break or a string of pearls, or a pair of pants or a wig with curls, or Another Chance. Everyone is just waiting.

No! That’s not for you!
Somehow you’ll escape all that waiting and staying. You’ll find the bright places where Boom Bands are playing. With banner flip-flapping, once more you’ll ride high! Ready for anything under the sky. Ready because you’re that kind of a guy!

Oh, the places you’ll go! There is fun to be done! There are points to be scored. There are games to be won. And the magical things you can do with that ball will make you the winning-est winner of all. Fame! You’ll be famous as famous can be, with the whole wide world watching you win on TV.

Except when they don’t. Because, sometimes, they won’t.

I’m afraid that some times you’ll play lonely games too. Games you can’t win ‘cause you’ll play against you.

All Alone!
Whether you like it or not, Alone will be something you’ll be quite a lot.

And when you’re alone, there’s a very good chance you’ll meet things that scare you right out of your pants. There are some, down the road between hither and yon, that can scare you so much you won’t want to go on.

But on you will go though the weather be foul. On you will go though your enemies prowl. On you will go though the Hakken-Kraks howl. Onward up many a frightening creek, though your arms may get sore and your sneakers may leak. On and on you will hike. And I know you’ll hike far and face up to your problems whatever they are.

You’ll get mixed up, of course, as you already know. You’ll get mixed up with many strange birds as you go. So be sure when you step. Step with care and great tact and remember that Life’s a Great Balancing Act. Just never forget to be dexterous and deft. And never mix up your right foot with your left.

And will you succeed?
Yes! You will, indeed!
(98 and ¾ percent guaranteed.)

Kid, you’ll move mountains!
So…be your name Buxbaum or Bixby or Bray or Mordecai Ale Van Allen O’Shea, you’re off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
So…get on your way!

first baby Photoshoot!!

Goals!!

..So The girls went to a movie with my sweet Sissy <3 SO Im blogging and came up with a topic- GOALS!!! I have never accomplished anything in my life that I can recal except maybe natural child birth, but I though that it would be safe to share my New Years Resolution with this blogger world......


I havent been too excited to do a new years resolution, or to put it better- make it public, but I think that since it is something that I will have no problem commiting to( HA i say that now) I dont think it would hurt to share- or confess that YES , I do have a new years resolution :) ready? I have been keeping a photo journal of a day into my life- something completely random- it may be a picture of a foot , dinner that night- a kid caked in... well.... cake or a sunset etc. - but that is one of my personal resolutions, as well to do 1 craft a month!!! These are my two deepest passions- photography and the need for CrEaTivE Funk . I want to make it my goal to post weekly on my blog the pictures that I took for that week as well as monthly the craft that I have chosen for the Month :) I really feel like God is wanting me to focus on my gifts and not be so caught up into what I really want to be good at The Parable of the Talents( Mathew 25) has been something that the Lord has been laying on my heart!! SO i want to make my life simplistic and really focus on whats right in front of me- my children and my husband and what I can do to bring my Father delight through serving them. I have been called to teach and help and i think that is a good place to start...... I tend to get so overwhelmed by the big picture that it knocks me down and disables me from doing anything- So this verse pretty much sums it up-
mathew 25:21"His master replied, 'Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master's happiness!"